G-UP! Ephesians 6:13~18

13Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. 14Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness; 15And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace; 16Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. 17And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God: 18Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;

Tuesday, August 9, 2016

Put Respect on the Gift(s) that God has Graced you with

Romans 11:29 tells us that the gifts and calling of God are without repentance.  To put this scripture into perspective we must understand what the Apostle Paul wanted to communicate.  Chapter 11 talks about the opportunity provided to the Gentiles to receive the hope of salvation after Israel rejected the gospel.  As Paul stresses the example of wild branches being grafted into the tree and having the opportunity to bloom, he also strongly emphasizes that the original branches are still available to be grafted back in as well and one day they will indeed!  Paul believed that the returning of the children of Israel will lead the homecoming of all to God!

As Paul describes this great day and this great time, He makes that comment that the gifts and calling of God are without repentance.  What does that mean in this context of telling all that Israel will again fully return to God?  He means that when God says something, when He makes a decree, when He issues a gift and a calling, He does not take it back.  God called the Children of Israel and He has not rescinded that calling.  God has gifted and called us and He has not taken any of those gifts or any of that calling back.

Far to many of us are walking around with the precious gifts and calling of God all on and over our lives yet we are acting bewildered about what we should be doing with them.  Frankly some of us act like we never even received God's gifts and/or calling or maybe we just don't want other people to know.  God's gifts and calling are not a secret.  If you've been called you know you've been set aside, set apart, consecrated and called.  You can deny it all you want, but at the end of the day you know that you know that you know and others know it to because the anointing cannot be denied.  Most of the time people feel the anointing of your gifts and your calling and they are simply waiting for you to acknowledge it.  That's the trigger, key and linchpin that releases the activation of the gift and the calling.

We have to get in gear and respect the gifts and calling of God on our lives.  God has graced us with what we need to enjoy an abundant life.  God has told us that above all things He wants us to prosper and be in good health even as our very soul prospers.  To aid us in that prosperous living He has made us all after His likeness and in His image by giving us creativity and gifting.  These gifts and the calling having nothing to do with our intellect so our intellect cannot comprehend it.  We cannot unlock our gifts with our brain power.  We cannot make the gift and the calling work by sitting around thinking about it for days, months weeks and years.  In order for the gifts to begin to work we must first acknowledge the gifts and the calling and that their origin is God.  In order to allow the gifts to work for us, we must give God glory for the gifts and calling and be determined that God get all the glory from the use of the gifts and the calling.  We must acknowledge God in all our ways and admit that He knows what's best for us and that in order for us to experience that best He gave us the gift that would work on our behalf.  Then we must work the gift and accept the calling. 

God makes no mistakes and everyone single life has a gift.  It may take many years before we discover our gifts.  That passing of time doesn't make your gift void or unusable.  As soon as we acknowledge the gifts and that God is the giver we put ourselves into the position for the gifts to open up abundant living opportunities for us.  Those opportunities may not come easily and they may seem like trials, hardships and tough times, but remember that all things work together for the good of them that love the Lord and who are the called according to His purpose.  Work your gifts and accept your calling and see what God will do for you!  There's no escaping His manifold blessings when you obey!

Today make it up in your mind to respect God's gifts and calling on your life.  Make it up in your mind to lean not to your own understanding, but to acknowledge God in all your ways.  Trust Him and trust that life's circumstances and this journey will provide opportunity for your gifts to be used.  Relinquish your resistance and realize that your gifts and your calling will make room for you and bring you into the presence of great men because God said so.  He has graced us with creativity.  He has made us after His image and likeness.  You have purpose.  You have divine destiny and it is within our grasp.  Today is the day that we respect what God has put in us and give it back to Him in order to guide others to Him and to give Him all the glory.

Tuesday, May 3, 2016

A Substance Abuse Problem

The Bible tells us in Hebrews 11:1 "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.  Breaking down the scripture further let's define a few words.  Faith means complete trust or confidence and a strong belief in God based on spiritual apprehension rather than proof.  Substance means the real physical matter of which a person or a thing consists.  Evidence is the available body of facts or information indicating whether a belief is true; proof, confirmation, verification.

I offer that many of us have a substance abuse problem.  We think we understand the meaning of the word substance when we read the scripture.  But in fact what we have been taught and what we understand substance to be is something tactile.  It's something we can touch or experience with our natural senses and so as a result we are looking for something tangible to anchor our faith in.  So oftentimes what happens to us is we pray and we wait for a sign.  We tell God what we want and then we go wait by the chimney for Santa to deliver our gifts or we give God our laundry list of desires and then we see answers in superstion and whatever will satisfy our own mind that we've heard from the Lord.  But in fact the definition of the word substance that we have known our entire lives is not what faith is.  Faith is not physical nor is it a thing that can be exprerienced by our touch, hearing, sight, taste or smell.  The Greek word used in the verse above is "hupostasis."  The meaning of it is a firm foundation.  So in fact our faith is not based in the power wishful or positive thinking.  It isn't in our thinking at all.  Our faith is connected to our heart and it is a knowing that God did it before; therefore, He WILL do it again.  It is a knowing that we experience in our spirit.  We can encourage our mind by reading the Word and hiding the Word in our hearts, but what we cannot do is substitute the firm foundation of what our heart knows about our God for a flimsy, phoney, or flighty physical manifestation.  The faith is the revelation that God's Word is yea and amen.  Faith is the firm foundation of our hopes and it is the confirmation, verification and the proof of our beliefs.

Today let us renouce our substance abuse problem and let us elect to open our hearts and let faith find it's true resting place in the peace of trusting that God is real, He is not a man that He should lie.  What He says He will complete and perform.  His Word will not return unto Him void.  As the older generation used to say, God said, I believe it and that settles it!

Home Improvement

I awoke this morning with some concern.  As I took my concern to the Lord, He lead me to Matthew 19:16 to 22, which reads:

16 And someone came to Him and said, “Teacher, what [essentially] good thing shall I do to obtain eternal life [that is, eternal salvation in the Messiah’s kingdom]?” 17 Jesus answered, “Why are you asking Me about what is [essentially] good? There is only One who is [essentially] good; but if you wish to enter into eternal life, keep the commandments.” 18 He said to Jesus, “Which commandments?” And Jesus answered, You shall not commit murder; You shall not commit adultery; You shall not steal; You shall not give false testimony;19 Honor your father and mother; and love your neighbor as yourself[that is, unselfishly seek the best or higher good for others]. 20 The young man said to Him, “I have kept all these things [from my youth]; what do I still lack?” 21 Jesus answered him, “If you wish to be perfect[that is, have the spiritual maturity that accompanies godly character with no moral or ethical deficiencies], go and sell what you have and give [the money] to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me [becoming My disciple, believing and trusting in Me and walking the same path of life that I walk].” 22 But when the young man heard this, he left grieving and distressed, for he owned much property and had many possessions [which he treasured more than his relationship with God].

The basis of my concern is that complacency seems to be the norm.  I find myself  
becoming complacent at times as though I've done what I need to do and there's no need to labor further.  I was also reading in Haggai and Zephaniah this morning regarding God's desire that people stop being complacent and get some gumption about themselves so that they may rebuild the House of the Lord.  Lastly I read Psalm 127:1 which stated that except the Lord build a house, they that build it labor in vain.

All of this led me to the conclusion that oftentimes we believe we have done enough; after all I have my job, I have my house, I have my car, I tell people about Jesus at my convenience.  I mean what else could I possibly be doing?  And yet we sing songs like "I Need More."  Signifying that we want Jesus to do more for us; to give us more of Himself; to pour out more to us.  In fact hasn't He already done it all?  What is truly needed is for us to do more; more to draw closer to Him; more to be less self-righteous; more to show that Jesus saves; more to minister; more to live a holy life; more to build the kingdom of God and on and on.

The significance of the story of the young rich man is that for so many of us we see ourselves as right on target.  The young man came to Jesus not really seeking an answer although he asked a question.  Jesus knew this, but allowed the situation to play out.  The young man really wanted to inform Jesus about what he had already done and in his mind surely there couldn't be any more to do that he had done, I mean he was the ultimate servant, he kept all the commandments since he was a child.  This young man really couldn't imagine what else there was to do.  What he failed to realize the entire time was who he was talking to.  He didn't see that he wasn in need of repair and that Jesus was the handyman.  He didn't know who Jesus really was because he was so enthralled and entangled in his own ego and so entrenched in his own self-agrandisement.  I mean after all he had it going on right?

We have the benefit of hindsight as we read this scripture so we can sit in a place of judgment of this young man.  We can clearly see that he was lacking humility.   We know that he went away sad because he treasured his possessions more than his relationship with God.  But in fact oftentimes we are in much the same position  as this young rich man because his real issue is that he lacked perspective.  He didn't really know Jesus and so he  could not comprehend what Jesus was offering him.  His thoughts went immediately to the   idea that something was being taken away from him and that made him sad.  

This young man needed some home improvement.  When you live in a house for a while you begin to notice its wear and tear. Eventually some things need repair.  As we walk this spiritual journey we ought to notice the leaks, the cracks, the broken down items and things in need of  repair in our spiritual home.  Jesus is the ultimate repairman.  He presents to us the tools needed to firm up our foundation and to repair our broken places.  He shows us the places that need repair and sends preachers, pastors, teachers and the like into our lives to assist us with the repairs.  The interesting thing about the repairs that we must make to enhance our own lives is that the work is not just us working on ourselves in a vacuum.  Instead it is us performing kingdom building and kingdom work that in turn serves to  repair our leaks and fill in our cracks.  Once we truly admit that we need repair and we're not just trying to show God how together we already are, because doesn't He know us?; Doesn't he know how raggedy we are?  Of course He does.  He knows that we are weak, this is why He sends us messengers to help us and to steer us into the right direction.  This is why He sent Jesus.  Now we have to let Jesus set the foundation and make sure that it is He in the building.  

When we do this there is a chance that we can be used to help someone else.  Today let's not become complacent and think to ourselves that we are doing what we need to do.  Rather let's ask God for a paradigm shift so that we can do what He has called us to do.  Let's improve our home by building the Kingdom of God, because as we take care of God's house He takes care of ours.

Thursday, October 15, 2015

We are victorious

2 Chronicles chapter 20 is the story of King Jehoshaphat and the children of Israel being attacked by a joint union of the Moabites, the Ammonites and the Meunites.  Military intelligence revealed that a large number of soldiers were coming and in fact were already near.  It is certain that the enemies of King Jehoshaphat and the children of Israel planned to take the City by surprise and by shear numbers to overwhelm them.  But as the passage unfolds we see that the first thing that King Jehoshaphat did was to go to God in prayer.  In his prayer to the Lord, he reminded God of how they were obedient when they first occupied the city and they didn't fight with the Moabites, Ammonites or Meunites.  Then he reminded God of the promises that God had made to the Children of Israel to give them the land.  Not only did he pray separately in his very own "war room" but he then evoked corporate prayer by assembling the people together.  In the midst of the people King Jehoshaphat proclaimed God's promises and God's preeminence.  Then the Word was confirmed by Jahaziel who assured the King and the people that the battle was in fact not even theirs to fight or win, but it was the Lord's.  After that the King lead the people in corporate worship and praise.  The next day they arose with praise in the mouths.  The Bible says the King even appointed a choir to sing about the greatness of God and about His everlasting love.  The Bible goes on to say that as soon as the Children of Israel started singing and praising loudly, God set up ambushes for their enemies so that they were confused and instead of fighting the Children of Israel they fought each other and annihilated each other in the melee.  After the fighting King Jehoshaphat and the Children of Israel spent three days collecting the spoils.

This story should serve as encouragement for us that the answer is not in our physical efforts, but in our prayer, praise and worship or our spiritual fight.  We often say that prayer and praise together are a lethal combination, but this testament makes that point clear.  The fact is that once King Jehoshaphat turned his face to pray, putting God first, all of those would be enemies were already defeated.

God has already defeated the enemy in our lives.  We are already victorious!  How do we know?  Because if He did it before, which we know He did by this passage, then He will do it again.  King Jehoshaphat had a lot of choices.  He could have become afraid.  He could have called in advisers.  He could have starting calling in favors.  He could have commanded to assemble the armies.  He would have been within his rights to do any of those things, but the example that he set was that he immediately turned to God in prayer.

When we are facing enemies to our peace, to our success, to our well being, to the promises that God has already set in place for us and to our destiny, our first action should be to turn to God in prayer.  Our second response should be to give God praise for who He is and for what He has already done.  Like David at Ziklag, we have got to remember how God strengthened our hand before.  I call that the rewind praise.  Then we have got to look forward to what God is about to do.  I call that the fast forward praise.

Remember that after the Moabites, Ammonites and Meunites had turned on and destroyed one another, the Children of Israel were able to benefit by collecting the spoils.  The Bible is clear that the wealth of the wicked is laid up for the righteous.  You may feel that an untenable situation has come upon you and that you are surrounded on every side, but God may in fact be setting you up to be the benefactor of someone else's confusion and failed plans to attack you or to bring you down.  I'm certain that when King Jehoshaphat originally set his face to pray to the Lord he wasn't thinking about how the enemy would be defeated or if there would be spoils to collect.  No.  He was clearly focused on the task of communing with God, praising Him and reminding Him of His promises.

So today, know that whatever battle you face naturally our job is to take it to God spiritually for we wrestle not with flesh and blood.  Our real weapons, which will never be defeated, are our prayer, praise and worship.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

This is the re-take

Recently, a dear friend said, "I can see that my tests are closer together."  Then she went on to describe how she'd been presented with two different scenarios several times with in the span of only a few days.  James put it this way in chapter 1:

2My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations;
  3Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience.
  4But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.
  5If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.

Have you felt lately that you are going through the same tests or the same experiences over and over again and that those tests are closer together?  For some of us it may be dealing with people at work, in the community or at church.  For others of us it may be challenging to saving or giving each time we receive our pay check.  When we, in affect, fail our tests or our challenges, the enemy wants to cover up the fact that that test was meant to make you stronger.  He wants to distract from the purpose of the test.  The test isn't to highlight your failings in a way that brings shame or makes you  feel poorly. Not at all.  The test is actually a way to show you that you are making progress.  That's why when my friend said her tests were closer together, I knew that she was nearer to her victory!  The enemy wants you to feel so ashamed and so condemned when you have a failure that you delay re-take and find it difficult to connect the dots between your tests and experience how God is strengthening you.  Let me try to explain it this way.  When I was very young, around 12 or so, it was prophesied to me that I would be a preacher.  That information was scary at that age, but it rang true some place within me.  I knew it was accurate in my spirit.  But there was a major issue.  I was and remain painfully shy.  It sort of reminds me of Moses telling God that he wasn't able to speak to the people.  But here's the thing, God calls and God chooses.  He does so at His will and for His glory.  So now in my hindsight, I can look back over my life and see all I have been through, each test, each trial, all of my tribulations and I can sew them together into a tapestry that reveals the picture of how God has nudged me into His purpose for my life.  It's amazing when you give it some thought.  God actually meant my failings and my rough patches to be for my good?  He meant for all of that to make me stronger, wiser, better and fit for His use and purpose?  He did that just for me?  It makes you look at your re-takes so differently.  Failing isn't failure unless we refuse to learn and grow from it.  Failing is a necessary stepping stone in growing stronger.

I imagine the life of a body builder.  We see the after pictures.  These individuals have bodies that look awesome.  Yet we weren't there during the building process.  We werent there through the pain.  We were just witnesses to the end results.  That body builder had to discipline himself exercise everyday  and had to deny himself when he wanted to eat sweet snacks.  He had to push himself to workout and to lift more weight each time.  The process took time, it didn't happen overnight.  But as he went along he would measure his muscle growth and he could  tell that his endurance was getting better.  Think of yourself as a spirit builder.  Like a body builder, your spirit must be challenged so that you can see your growth and so that you can tell that you now have more endurance.  Consider how Paul viewed this in Romans 5:
1Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ:
  2By whom also we have access by faith into this grace wherein we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God.
  3And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience;
  4And patience, experience; and experience, hope:
  5And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.  
Truly our progress is measured in faith and maturity.  Our standard is Jesus Christ.  We strive to be like Him in how we show love toward each other and how we have compassion for people.  We work to build our endurance to be like Christ in how we show up for our divine appointments and act as conduits to allow His will to be done on earth as it is in heaven.  Truly we strive to be like Christ in facilitating a real relationship between God and His people.  But often people don't see the work of our spiritual building and our maturity.  They don't see the pain and the trials that bring out patience and discipline.  They don't see how we learn to give and how we become aware so that we are not ignorant of Satan's devvices against us.  They see the result, but we know our struggle and that our struggle sometimes comes in waves of tests  that are back to back showing us that we have gained spiritual muscle and endurance.
Today, be purposeful in your spirit building.  Set your eyes on the standard, Jesus Christ.  Strive to be humble like Him.  Strive to serve like Him.  Strive to live like Him.  Before you know it you will be measuring your success in faith through experience which results in hope.






Thursday, September 11, 2014

Then, I am strong . . .

In 2 Corinthians chapter 12 Paul states that the enemy handed him an ailment to keep him, Paul, humble.  Paul tells us that he asked God to take the ailment away on three different occasions.  I was reading this scripture today and it struck me that God did not take the ailment away the first time that Paul prayed, nor did God take it away the second time Paul prayed nor did God take it away the third time that Paul prayed.  In fact, it is notable that God never took the thorn away, but He told Paul that it was in weakenss that he would find his strength.  Does that mean that Paul was ineffective at praying?  Does that mean that Paul lacked the faith for God to remove the ailment from him?  The modern church views Paul as a learned, wise, passionate and strong patriarch of faith.  Paul was a fervent servant of God and in our hindsight we herald this apostle as one of the most articulate communicators of the truth and proof of Jesus Christ and he is credited for single handedly bringing the Word of God to gentiles.  So what does all of this mean?  Does it mean that God simply doesn't answer some prayers?

I'm glad that I've grabbed your curiosity.  I'll tell you what all of this means.  God in fact answered Paul the first time that Paul prayed.  It took Paul three times to hear, process and understand God's response.  So even the most revered Christians at times struggle to accept God's communication to us.  Sometimes we pray fervently for the answer that we want.  We sweat.  We cry.  We declare and we decree.  We wail and we moan.  We get others to pray with us.  But you know what?  God's answer is His answer and we need to hear it, process it, accept it and understand it.  After the third time of God not removing the ailment that had been handed to Paul, Paul was finally in a place to hear what God had been trying to communicate to him from the first time that he had prayed.  God was trying to tell Paul that He works best in our vulnerabilities and in our weakness.  We hear from God more clearly in our broken state.  We are more open for hearing His communication to us when we are in need.  Not only that, but when we hear, process and accept God's communication, we move ourselves, our ideas of what is right and what should happen out of the way and we are able to allow God's will to be done in our lives.  So many times He wants to show Himself strong.  He wants to prove His word.  He wants to be lifted up above our circumstances and situations.  He wants to be lifted up above the earth so that He can draw others to Him and we are His conduit to make that happen.  But understand that God's power shows up better on the backdrop of our ability to endure in spite of whatever situation or circumstance we find ourselves in.  For Paul that was the thorn in his flesh, it was imprisonment, it was being beaten, and it was preaching the word anyway and in spite of and through it all.  Paul's life serves as a powerful testament of how to persevere anyhow.  So we may have felt badly for him because he had an ailment that He wanted God to take away, but you see we are able to overcome today because of Paul's powerful testimony that in the middle of a thorn and in the midst of jail and in the process of being beaten, Paul preached Jesus Christ to anyone who would listen and he did it with the same level if not even more passion!  It was in this that God was lifted up above Paul's thorn.  God was made the main focus.

Today, when you think of an ailment that you are struggling with or maybe one that a friend or relative is struggling with, understand that the answer may not always be for God to take that thing away.  Some times it is, but not always.   Accept God's will.  Accept that God knows what He is doing.  Trust that God has your best interest at the core of all that He does in your life.  Trust that God will give you glory in the situation through sufficient grace.  Trust Him, not what you are experiencing with your physical senses.  Trust Him and take Him at His word.  Hear His answer.  Accept His answer.  Understand His answer.  Know that He will give you sufficient grace to endure.  Know that He is the focus and His will is the primary objective.

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Why Do We Long for the Counterfeit?

Today's blog is about transparency for me.  I recently had an experience after which God showed me how He carried me through it; how He protected me in it; and how much He loves me and that He kept me.  When I awoke to this revelation, I immediately worshiped Him and blessed His name.  However, I did begin to wonder why I was longing for a counterfeit.

In the present case, I had been harboring a deep hurt in a very dark place.  That hurt had trapped me into a place where I had refused to declare the Word of healing.  It is no secret, as I have previously shared in this blog that I was abused by my father for 15 years of my childhood.  I had locked that pain in a dark and desolate place in my mind.  I had gone to therapy, I had spoken with counselors and with my pastors, I felt that I had dealt with the hurt.  But in fact that dark place needed to be eradicated and I had only put a very ineffective lock on a very rickety door.  The hurt and pain were still there.  The need to fully forgive was still hanging.  And frankly from time to time I would visit that dark place to remind me of what was missing in my life.

What I didn't understand was that you cannot simply allow hurt space to live in your mind.  The hurt creates a void and that void begins to suck.  That sucking then brings people into your life who have no way of filling the void, but who know how to manipulate you because they recognize that this void is your weak place.  There is only one who can fill such a void because it takes a being who has the ability to step in and out of time, who can go into your past, completely heal your hurt and make you whole.  So in my case, I felt that I needed love; that no one in my life had provided me a foundation of love and support and a basis for trust.  I felt that I needed to be loved properly and that such love had in fact eluded me my whole life.  That's where the vortex and the black hole began and it was sucking every thing and everyone around me in, or trying too.  I kept thinking I wasn't enough, but it was because that dark void was sucking in my confidence and my knowing that God was the author and finisher of my life and my faith.  There are people who see that sucking and recognize that there is a desperation to hang on to something.  So they interject themselves into your life to try to steal your anointing while you are distracted by your hurt.  And because you are so distracted by your hurt you never even notice that a counterfeit has entered in.  In fact because of our desperation, we become satisfied with the counterfeit.  We accept it as the truth.  There may be a nagging voice telling us the whole time that what we have isn't real and isn't of God.  There will be a voice telling us that what we have isn't going to help us, move us forward or support us, but that sucking desperation has a hold of us and we accept the counterfeit.

Today I was reading the book of Isaiah chapter 58.  This scripture discusses how we can be repairers of the breach.  The scripture text talks about how we can use what God has given us to help others and to repair the breach and in helping others we are also receiving help.  How does this relate to longing for counterfeit?  Well Isaiah 59 really helps to answer this.  Many times we cannot experience freedom in God and being restored, healed and made whole because we are pretending to seek light, when in fact we have become satisfied with darkness.  I had become satisfied with my hurt.  But there is no productivity in harboring hurt.  Therefore, I was never giving myself an opportunity to be successful.  I couldn't speak the word of healing over my life.  I couldn't admit that God is my all and all because I wanted to hang on to hurt and that hurt gave me the excuse to distrust God.

But today I declare that God has taken away that hurt and that pain and I can proclaim healing and wholeness in the name of Jesus.  I am whole and if God never does another thing for me I am whole and well and He is my savior.  I am a breach repairer.  God has given my gifts and talents with which to minister healing and deliverance.  I refuse to accept the counterfeit any longer.  God is the genuine article and He is mine and I am His.  I refuse to allow one more person to try to act like they have the potential to fill a void in my life.  Why?   Because the void no longer exists.  Christ has forgiven me of my sin, healed my hurt and made me whole; therefore, there is no more sucking and bringing the wrong person to me trying to hustle my anointing and make my ministry of none effect.

Today can you declare that you are done with the counterfeit?  Can you declare that you are actually trying the spirits by the Spirit?  Can you declare that its for God you live and for God that you'll die?  Can you say that you genuinely and wholeheartedly rely on God?  I can.  Thank you Jesus.  I finally can.